I’m Starting to Hate Lightning McQueen

Photo via Disney Parks Blog

It’s surprising, really, that I can muster up negative feelings for any Pixar creation, because really, truly, those folks do good work. But McQueen and I have had a slowly simmering beef for awhile now, but I was willing to overlook the absurd amount of space his merchandise takes up in the Disney Store and his thinly veiled direct-to-DVD movie that was packaged as a summer blockbuster that I spent $16 on. But joining the Lights, Motors, Action show at Hollywood Studios? You’ve gone too far, my friend.

At this point, I’m convinced Lightning is in cahoots with Duffy for Disney Domination. And I get it – Disney needs to make money, and Cars merchandise sells. Totally fine. But would it kill the good people over at Disney Parks to put some thought into these things? You can picture that staff meeting where someone said, “we have an automotive stunt show, and the kiddies love Lightning McQueen, so let’s add him in.” That guy probably got a bonus. And without going to Hollywood Studios, I’m willing to bet that there’s a Cars merchandise kiosk over by the amphitheatre exit now.

Here’s the problem – yes, Lightning’s a car, and a popular car at that, but it doesn’t fit with the show. The show is about how stunt people pull off crazy chase scenes in all them talkin’ pictures. Like the Indiana Jones Stunt Spectacular – it’s a show about live-action filmmaking. And I hate to point out the obvious, but Lightning is an animated character. Having him appear in the show, even if it’s just a cameo, makes zero sense. “Oh hey, look, it’s Lightning McQueen! How’d you get here?” “Well, I have a team of animators who make me do all the same things you’ve demonstrated here, but with no danger or explosions involved. Ka-chow!” GO AWAY. GO AWAY, CAR.

And Pixar Place is just a few steps away! Why can’t Lightning go hang out over there? This new policy of throwing darts at a WDW map to determine character placement is really disturbing. What’s next? Aladdin and Jasmine in the Indiana Jones Stunt Spectacular?

What do you think? Have you seen the show? Is Lightning’s addition as lame as it seems on paper?
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Related Links:
* The War on Duffy
* Overheard in WDW: Sunset Blvd Edition
* Segway Tours in WDW: This is How I Roll